Africa: Hidden Thoughts & Emotions on Love among African Bloggers

14th February, better known as Valentine’s day , the love mood was not only felt on the streets of Nairobi by the many red flowers, ladies dressed in all manner of red clothes, and offers in

A Valentines day heart

A Valentines day heart

every shop; The Sunday dailies were awash with stories of lovers with advertisements taking most of the space with the aim of giving one ideas on how to spoil their lover on that day.

The story was no different online.

Njeri who also calls herself La Femme reveals how she got flowers from her man, a surprise which she didn’t expect.

Valentine's Day is today. Happy Valentine's Day. It was a good day. I got flowers yesterday from Mr. Man. They were gorgeous and the message on the card was sweet. I absolutely loved them. Funny (or not so funny) thing is that Mr. Man had convinced me that he wasn't going to get me anything for Valentne's Day. I was straight up bummed. But later he said that he had to tell me that so that I wouldn't ruin the surprise. Yesterday was a happy day, I was animatedly excited. Thanks babe for the flowers:)
I got him a book. I hope he'll like it. I think he will, and a Valentine's Day card.

Reading her post, one can clearly tell that she is the reason why the day has never failed to disappoint.

P.K.W- Proud Kikuyu Woman’s valentine day was not such a joyful one, the man that sent her a card, wine and chocolate and who wants to marry her is not the man that she sees herself spending the rest of her life with.

The thing is that I’m already thinking of how to end it with the Man, because I don’t see his clan bringing goats and cows (actually these days it’s their equivalent in Kenya Shillings) to mine in exchange of me. We had agreed that the walk down the aisle can be done several years down the line, or even never, as long as the legal thing had been done so he’s not left free to ‘buy’ as many wives as he can afford. We had even set dates for the initial unofficial Meet the Family visits last December, before I suggested that we postpone for a later, unspecified date.

The day leaves her wondering if she will ever get married, turning 32 this August and the chances getting slimmer.

Inari Media chose the day to encourage the single ladies not to rush to ‘put a ring on it’.

Her article that lists all the privileges that a woman will lose if/when she agrees to a man’s proposal can easily make one change their mind. But as she warns at the beginning of the article, she herself might just be tripping up the isle of a registry office at some point in future.

No matter how much lip service either party pays to equality between the sexes, studies have shown that women will still do the bulk of the housework amongst co-habitating heterosexual couples. Not only that, but where health and earnings are concerned, marriage will actually be of greater benefit to a husband than to a wife. Should a woman have the temerity to breed, she will be the parent expected to manage the bulk of the childcare too. Even if they return to work after maternity leave, they will find themselves on the “Mummy Track,” possibly demoted, but definitely sidelined from greater career progression. Some unfortunate women even find themselves dismissed, and consequently find it difficult to find an employer willing to take on a woman with responsibilities outside the office.

Daniel Ngari choose to focus on polygamy by using King Solomon, South Africa’s president Jacob Zuma and our individual goals as his reference points.
His is an interesting exploration of our faults in marrying and sticking to our goals to the end yet we are all quick to judge those in polygamous marriages.

Tamaku who runs the Diary of a Gay Kenyan chose to celebrate his on 13th with his love George preferring not to risk being admonished on Sunday 14th.

A South African Blogger, pessimist Incarnate observed that there was a lot of vibrations on Valentines day according to Seismologists all around the world.

“I definitely felt the Earth move last night,” said Dawn Jarvis of The American Seismological Institute. “The mattress was bouncing and the springs were squeaking and it rocked my world……..”

While none of the affected could offer any explanation for the increased seismic activity, it should be noted that there was a definite correlation in the intensity of movement to the amount of chocolates, flowers, and Lacey red lingerie which were found in each home of those interviewed,

It is still on this lovers day that the Malawian president Bingu Wa Mutharika engaged his newly found love, former Minister of Tourism and Wildlife, Callista Chapola Chimombo at a colourful ceremony in the country's Capital City, Lilongwe.

2 comments

  • meaning of valentine day have been changed in lot of ways..i feel this remains no more affection now as it was previous…

    http://ultimatedestinationoflove.blogspot.com/

  • Danielle Nierenberg

    Just thought you might be interested in a piece I wrote from Lilongwe, Malawi, for the Wausau Daily Herald called “Husband and his wife are helping an African nation farm it’s was out of poverty.” I am blogging everyday from Africa and writing for the Worldwatch Institute’s Nourishing the Planet blog at http://blogs.worldwatch.org/nourishingtheplanet/. Please feel free to cross-post on your site. All the best, Danielle Nierenberg

    Here is the piece:

    Stacia and Kristof Nordin have an unusual backyard, and it looks a lot different from the Edgar yard in which Kristof grew up.
    Rather than the typical bare dirt patch of land that most Malawians sweep “clean” every day, the Nordins have more than 200 varieties of mostly indigenous vegetables growing organically around their house. They came to Malawi in 1997 as Peace Corps volunteers, but now call Malawi home. Stacia is a technical adviser to the Malawi Ministry of Education, working to sensitize both policymakers and citizens about the importance of using indigenous foods and permaculture to improve livelihoods and nutrition. Kristof is a community educator who works to train people at all levels of Malawian society in low-input and sustainable agricultural practices.

    The Nordins use their home as a demonstration plot for permaculture methods that incorporate composting, water harvesting, intercropping and other methods that help build organic matter in soils, conserve water, and protect agricultural diversity. Most Malawians think of traditional foods, such as amaranth and African eggplant, as poor-people foods grown by “bad” farmers. But these crops might hold the key for solving hunger, malnutrition and poverty in Malawi — as well as in other African countries.
    Nowhere needs the help more than Malawi, a nation of 14 million in southeast Africa that is among the least developed and most densely populated on Earth.

    The country might be best known for the so-called “Malawi Miracle.” Five years ago, the government decided to do something controversial and provide fertilizer subsidies to farmers to grow maize. Since then, maize production has tripled and Malawi has been touted as an agricultural success story.

    But the way they are refining that corn, says Kristof, makes it “kind of like Wonder Bread,” leaving it with just two or three nutrients. Traditional varieties of corn, which aren’t usually so highly processed, are more nutritious and don’t require as much artificial fertilizer as do hybrid varieties.

    “Forty-eight percent of the country’s children are still nutritionally stunted, even with the so-called miracle,” Kristof says.
    Rather than focusing on just planting maize — a crop that is not native to Africa — the Nordins advise farmers with whom they work that there is “no miracle plant — just plant them all.” Research has shown that Malawi has more than 600 indigenous and naturalized food plants to choose from. Maize, ironically, is one of the least suited to this region because it’s highly susceptible to pests, disease and erratic rainfall patterns.

    Unfortunately, the “fixation on just one crop,” says Kristof, means that traditional varieties of foods are going extinct — crops that already are adapted to drought and heat, traits that become especially important as agriculture copes with climate change.
    “Design,” says Kristof, “is key in permaculture,” meaning that everything from garden beds to the edible fish pond to the composting toilet have an important role on their property. And although their neighbors have been skeptical, they’re impressed by the quantity — and diversity — of food grown by the family. More than 200 indigenous fruits and vegetables are grown on their small plot of land, providing a year-round supply of food to the Nordins and their neighbors.

    In addition, they’re creating a “model village” by training several families who rent houses on the property,) to practice and teach others about the permaculture techniques that they use around their homes. They also have built an “edible playground,” where children can play, eat and learn about various indigenous fruits.

    More important, the Nordins are showing that by not sweeping, burning and removing all organic matter, people can get more out of the land than just maize and reduce their dependence on high-cost agricultural inputs in the process.

    And indigenous crops can be an important source of income for farmers. Rather than import amaranth, sorghum, spices, tamarinds and other products from India, South Africa and other countries, the Nordins are helping farmers find ways to market seeds, as well as value-added products, from local resources. These efforts not only provide income and nutrition, but fight the “stigma that anything Malawian isn’t good enough,” says Kristof. “The solutions,” he says, “are literally staring us in the face.”

    And as a visitor walked around seeing and tasting the various crops at the Nordins’ home, it became obvious that maize is not Malawi’s only miracle.

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