Comments on: Madagascar: Living abroad changes a man

By: Lova Rakotomalala

Lova Rakotomalala — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 19:50:54 +0000

@Joe Anderson and Revirevy

Points well taken. From personal experience, I would agree that the reason expatriates seem less willing to communicate with folks back home has more to do with trying to adapt to a new environment rather than a new “bourgeois identity”. In the context of Malagasy culture, where fihavanana (aka ubuntu) is so prominent, the abrupt change in the flow of communication is always a bit of a shocker.
As pointed out by Revirevy, the expectation of success for expatriates can be a heavy load to carry and many would rather forego communication than sharing the struggles of real life overseas.
Really appreciated your feedback and I will forward it to the initiator of the conversation.

By: revirevy

revirevy — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 15:27:02 +0000

Hi,
Let me have a little say on this.
There are things people may understand before picking a conclusion as fast from happenings.
First of all, a voicemail doesn’t always mean don’t disturb. Maybe it’s not time to him to wakeup, maybe he is on meeting …Likewise, mail is not reliable all time, how can you be sure your mail were not considered spam??
Anyway let’s assume that your friend doesn’t want to have connection with you. And I thing that is the truth.
Why? because he is busy (maybe) or the opposite and doesn’t want people to sense his idleness.
Maybe he is trying to avoid what all malagasy who live abroad dread the most: to be considered the saviour of mankind. There is a myth in everyone’s subconscience in Madagascar that living abroad means success and wealth. Everyone lust and long for a little piece of euros from that person. Thinking that money is flowing like river in “abroad”. Anyone who gain nothing is despised.
But reality “abroad” is far away from what every middle class malagasy dream about. So the poor guy is torn between everyone’s expectations (including his own) and the real demise he is living through.
This is putting misunderstanding between those who are day-dreaming in madagascar and those who go abroad and face the reality (not quoting before all the fact of being not welcome to the host country)(xenophobia).
And the easiest not the best solution for most is to cut all relationship from mother country.

And that is bad.

By: Joe Anderson

Joe Anderson — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 19:07:01 +0000

While your points about assimilative dissonance certainly resonate with me, don’t you think there could be more practical and less melodramatic forces at work here? I think most importantly, when someone is immersed in a new place and ‘culture’, at great physical distance from their ‘home’, it is easier to wrap oneself in a sort of protective sleeve that keeps your commitments and daily interests in your former life from tugging at you and simply making you sad and lonely. I mean, I don’t think that I’m convinced that people we love, upon leaving for ‘greener pastures’ are just so caught up in their new bourgeois identity that they can’t remember who they are and who their former family and friends are. I think it’s much less romantic than that, much less novelistic. In fact, I think it’s simply a matter of having too much to do in the context of a ‘new life’ (which, we must admit, if one is willing to pursue life abroad/study abroad/etc., one must be willing to confront and adapt to) to pay attention to old commitments. Do some personalities do ‘better’ at this than others? Well, if you mean do some make a more concerted effort to communicate with folks ‘back home’ no matter how banal, trite and impersonal the communication is: yes, sure. Some folks are just better at daily maintenance, sending emails or letters, etc. However, I don’t think we should be so quick to dismiss folks who don’t as just so many Uncle Toms who have finally ‘made it’ in the white man’s bourgeois world and are no longer interested in their pasts or their families.